Leo, Our Little Lion Man

      Leo and I (Charis) had an appointment with a lactation consultant on Monday. We are working on transitioning to breastfeeding, if possible. However, because he is on fortified breastmilk, the process gets a little bit more complicated. They just need to make sure that he can gain the weight he needs to while breastfeeding. I don't need to go into all of the details of the appointment here, but could you please pray for the two of us in this transition specifically. I left the appointment feeling very overwhelmed but also encouraged. Leo was able to do a full volume feed at the breast in the appointment! The lactation consultant was very hopeful (and a little surprised). Our little fighter is still fighting.      Over the next couple of weeks I will be integrating breastfeeding in little by little as I also learn to read Leo's cues as to when he's hungry and when he's full--also learning to calm him down. On that note, another pressing prayer request is nights. Nig

       Leo went to the pediatrician yesterday for a one month check-up and weigh in. He gained 7.5 oz in one week! That's two weeks that he has been on track with weight from bottle feeds. Doctor gave me the official clear to cancel the feeding tube supplies. We are not going back to that. The doctor also marveled at Leo's muscle tone. Leo picked his head up from laying on his stomach! He is stronger in his limbs and shows good reflexes there. He is more alert in the eyes--he can look at you. Our doctor said that the next things to look for are if he can begin to track an object with his eyes and a smile. Those are one month and two month markers. However, with Leo's brain damage and being a premie we will not be worried if we don't see those markers at those times. It's just nice to know what to look for and pray for.     He is still not crying. Other than that there is not really visible evidence of his injury. We have seen prayers do amazing things. The fact that

    This is not an update. It's a journal entry from the day after Leo was born while Brad and I were still staying at the hospital (for one more night). It took me a bit to start processing what was happening. This was written while Leo was on a cooling mat. He started seizure medication, got morphine, and was being cooled. We couldn't rub his skin because that was too much stimulation. We could only lay a hand on his body.      I share this for two reasons mainly. One: Look what God has brought us from. We are not in this place anymore. He has worked miracles in Leo's life. And two, I really want to share a glimpse into a NICU mama experience. It's joining a family that you never wanted to be a part of, but it is a family. And it's a powerful experience, life-changing.      "I look at my body and don't see a baby--and then I realize that when I look up, he's not there either. That was the first way in which the emotions started to come through for me.

      We have had a good day.      Over the weekend we were hoping that Leo could gain weight so that the feeding tube did not have to be reinserted. Ladies and gentlemen, he gained 4oz! The doctor was very pleased with his weight gain. It's a confirmation that he is not expending too much energy in sucking. His feeds take about 20-30 minutes and then we are still holding him upright for 20-30 minutes afterwards to avoid some spit ups (although, believe me, he has had a few). He is sleeping and pooping well too.      The doctor also had good things to say about Leo's muscle tone and eye reflexes. His tone continues to improve. This little boy can lift his head up and look around more and more. And, as for his eyes, I know we have mentioned on here that we don't feel like he engages very well. It's difficult to say, though, because newborns don't really  engage with their eyes. Also, Leo is a premie so that is a factor as well. So, previously, the doctor has tested h

[Charis here. Also, photo dump below]  It was one week yesterday since Leo was discharged from the hospital. Wow, now even Philly feels like a world away. What a month Leo has lived on the "outside world"! Having him home has consisted of appointments, pumping (for me), diaper changes, feeding him, some tube care, meeting family, and figuring out what nights look like. It's hard to feel like "routine" is attainable. But we will get there. Being able to take care of him ourselves has been wonderful, but we are still figuring out how to live in the present with Leo and wait to see what the doctors say he can and can't do. It's hard to not dread certain things or hope for certain things. But God is in control. And Leo is our little miracle. He is taking bottles! So, as of yesterday, he is without a feeding tube. He pulled it out himself. At the hospital they always said, "We'll let Leo tell us when he's ready." Well, he told us. He had bee

  Another good doctor's appt for Leo today. The pediatrician was pleased with his ability lift his head and he still gained weight, though not quite as much as they hoped. Charis and Brad got the go ahead to let Leo drink as much as much as he wants from the bottle and he drank 40ml with the first bottle! Leo made his debut this Easter and met lots of the family who loves him. I got to spend the night to help out the new parents yesterday. Charis and Brad are a great team, and it warmed my hearts to watch them rising to the challenges of parenthood. The feedings take awhile and Leo needs to be held upright for at least 20 minutes after each one, so that was my job! Please, please continue to pray. Leo's brain has so much healing to do and Brad and Charis are so encouraged by your support. The tears still flow and after so many anxious days of hard news, it's difficult for them to feel confident in their ability to care for Leo at home (even though they are doing a GREAT job

  Leo had a follow up appointment today, and despite some spit ups and a few anxious days of doing feeds outside of the hospital, Leo continues to gain weight! Nana Julie has been helping with night duty so mom and dad can catch a few more winks at night. Pumping, bottle feeding, AND tube feeding takes a while! Charis and Brad are figuring out how to think through all the logistics of life with a newborn, complicated by a few extra worries. Getting comfortable leaving the house with the extra feeding equipment and without getting Leo's feedings off schedule will be the next hurdle. If we can request even more kindness from you all, I've restarted the meal train and posted the link below. You have all gone above and beyond already and we're so grateful! www.TakeThemAMeal.com/YGFC8317