Comprehension
I never know how to put this into words, but I'm going to try. Leo’s been understanding. And it feels weird to say for two reasons. 1) Being excited that Leo is understanding feels like I didn’t expect him to understand. And that feels like being a bad mom. 2) What if he can’t understand and I’m fooling myself? What about what other people think? What if they can’t tell what he’s communicating and think I’m crazy?
Now let me just say that I know that both of those reasons are untrue. But I think they’re worth mentioning.
Anyways, so comprehending. Where do I start? First off, I must say that we have the best therapists. I’m so grateful for how they work with and relate to Leo. They continually see his intelligence in a really beautiful way. So he does physical, occupational, speech, and vision therapy. And the basic way to say it is that we are using verbal instructions with him and he is showing that he understands. For example:
1) asking him to touch a specific colored toy
2) asking him to lift his hand out of the water—and splash
3) looking at a specific person in the room
4) reach for _____
5) sit down
6) take a breath
He knows what we’re asking of him.
Gosh, but I never feel like I’m communicating this well.
Let me say this. It’s a strange experience to parent a child who can’t say words and isn’t mobile. It can be easy to feel like things are supposed to look a certain way. But we’re figuring it out. It is so exciting to learn how he communicates, to get to know him better, and to assume comprehension always. It is terrifying to think about the times that I might get it wrong. I try and keep an open dialogue with Leo. “Mommy thinks you want this. But I am not sure. I’m sorry if I’m not understanding you, Leo. I want to know what you’re saying but I don’t always understand. I’m trying, though. And I appreciate you expressing to me.” It’s ok to tell him that I don’t know. It’s ok for him to not get everything he wants. It’s important to me to provide structure, safety, meet his needs, and set him up as best I can for what God has for him.
Look at that, I’m developing parenting opinions! Haha, I’m not a big-opinions person so this feels good.
All of that to say, Leo’s doing really well. And we are so excited with how he’s been communicating recently!
Thank you, Charis, for sharing. It is a big deal to see that you and your child will be able to have talks and understand each other. Lots of love for you, Brad and Leo.
ReplyDeleteFairly recently, Charis, I had my sister visit the speech therapist for a formal evaluation. While she is non-verbal, she understands essentially everything. However, the realization was that she isn't really non-verbal -- she makes the same sounds after each time I say, "I love you, Carmie." It is her way of saying, "I love you, too." We are on the evaluation list for a communications device. While at 55 years old, it may seem a bit late, it is potentially a move to help her now. There weren't these things when she was young.
ReplyDeleteSo, Charis, I am so happy that Leo is understanding! I am tingling right now with joy for that experience for you! I know Leo feels your love -- I see it in every photo you share. And I will say that I believe the purpose of those with special needs are to teach us more about love and compassion!
Hi Mama Charis...you have a special job and you are doing it so well. We think about and pray for you as the Lord brings you to mind... smile...i know that there are a bazillion people praying for you along with some pretty special grand parents. I don't know what all God has in mind for you guys...but He has this in mind for you now
ReplyDeleteYou simply amaze me (us)