Merry Chirstmas and Happy New Year!

    I don't really have new information on Leo, but I thought I'd do a "How are we doing?" post. 

    So Leo has surgery on Tuesday. We have 3 (not big) appointments on Monday. I will be going to Philly with Leo by train and Brad will drive there after work. We are staying the night in Philly and then going to be checked in at the hospital on the 4th. We are expecting to be there for 48 hours ish......

    I would say that Brad and I both have our ways of trying to cope with not having control over this situation. I'm sure a lot of people can relate to wanting to control certain things. We are sobered at the thought of staying in the hospital again. Just not sure how to feel about it. Personally, I am not looking forward to recovery and Leo potentially being in some pain. Brad is processing more of what the feeding tube means as far as Leo's future, a lot of fears can come up. I am also expecting that when we are discharged it will be a similar feeling to when we left the hospital the first time. 

    When we came home in April, Leo had an ng tube. I was pumping. We were starting therapies. And I hadn't taken care of a baby outside of the hospital before. I felt very overwhelmed and like I couldn't keep up with everything much less have any sort of life outside of this stuff. I think adjusting to feeds and handling reflux and going to follow ups and what not might be similar. I expect to feel overwhelmed by life and for other responsibilities to be pushed to the side. But I also expect to slowly learn and become very capable of these new routines that will come. I just want to skip this part and get to the part where it's already normal and learned. 

    We are currently trying to get everything done on our end to be ready for this surgery and stay. Please pray for good communication with doctors. I'm nervous that I should have scheduled an appointment and didn't realize it or that I won't ask the right questions when we are there. I also really want our doctors to be available via messages and such. I want to be able to contact the right person when I have a question or need help. Stress is very much a part of our week, needless to say.

    Please pray that Leo continues to gain and take his bottles well as we approach surgery. Pray for a successful trip, good surgery, wonderful care, and healthy recovery. Pray that reflux and feeds would be figured out and work in his body. And please pray that needs would be met. God knows what our needs are. I just pray that he shows us what they are and how he is in them.

    Thank you, thank you for your kindness to us. We know the throne room of heaven hears about Leo a lot <3




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