Leo is one week old!

Charis here. 

I don't know exactly where to start. I wanted to come on and give a little note about how Brad and I are doing and also to try and say "thank you" for the support we have gotten this past week. We are speechless, but I'm going to try.

First off, how are we doing? It's pretty safe to say that the last week has been the longest week of our lives. Sunday, March 7th started normally and by the evening I was looking at Brad saying, "Do you think this is it? Is this actually happening? What the heck?" Labor and delivery is it's own story. One of the most amazing experiences of my life. And it brought us our little lion man. But we did not know that anything was wrong until, literally, the moment Leo was born. That's when it all started.

It's been exhausting and overwhelming (obviously). It's been a rollercoaster because you never know when the next piece of news will come and whether it will be good or bad. It's been a new thing to experience this amount of emotion. We continue to pray together, cry to each other, and make sure we are letting it out. The temptation can be to close up and withdraw to try and protect yourself from the pain. But there's no way around it, only through. It's strange to experience parenthood for the first time like this. We have been shocked by the situation, we did not expect Leo to have the issues or complications that he does. We expected that all would be "normal." It's scary to consider what Leo's future may look like. But a comforting thought is just to revel in and thank the Lord again and again for this precious life. He is so precious. He is so valuable. And whatever answers we get do not change that. God loves him more than we do. Pretty hard to imagine, but true. We have prayed continually that God would surround Leo with his comfort, that Leo would know that he isn't alone, that Leo would be comforted by the presence of the Holy Spirit. It is difficult for us to see him hooked up to all this stuff and agitated. And it's difficult to say good-bye each night. But he is truly in the best care physically and spiritually. 

We have reach the end of our strength again and again. But we know the One who is not surprised by any of this. We know the One who knows the outcome. And, for whatever reason, God chose us to be Leo's parents. What I don't think I can do, God has said that I can--in His strength. 

In the book The Hiding Place, Corrie ten Boom gives a wonderful analogy that we have used over and over again. 

“Father sat down on the edge of the narrow bed. "Corrie," he began gently, "when you and I go to Amsterdam-when do I give you your ticket?"
I sniffed a few times, considering this.
"Why, just before we get on the train."
"Exactly. And our wise Father in heaven knows when we're going to need things, too. Don't run out ahead of Him, Corrie. When the time comes that some of us will have to die, you will look into your heart and find the strength you need-just in time.”

We know that God will give us the ticket when the time comes and not before. We pray that he will sustain us for the next ticket, and only worry about one ticket at a time. 

We are so grateful that since being in Philly we have received such good news and gotten to hold him. Please pray that Leo continues to improve. He is strong, our little fighter. Today we are headed to Lancaster after being with Leo for a few hours this morning. We will be packing for a longer stay. Our hotel for this weekend was provided. We will be moving in to an Airbnb when we come back. It was also provided for us. There are rooms where our parents can stay when they come and where we can visit with friends who come out. 

We are BLOWN AWAY by the support from you all. It's been such a gift to not have to take energy for figuring out certain logistics or food or worry about certain expenses. Our energy has been for Leo and being at his bedside. Also, having our parents here (both sets) was so crucial over the weekend. We could NOT do this alone. Yeah, that's all....it's been amazing. And we love reading your texts, comments, and messages. We do not feel pressure to respond to all of them, but we do enjoy responding when we can. There is strength to be drawn from the body of Christ and friends and family who are encouraging us. 

Thank you. I can't say that enough. 

Isaiah 41:10

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."