CHOP NICU Day #8

     Charis, again. It doesn't feel like we have as much to say today. But at the same time, there's so much going on in our heads and hearts. 

    Leo had a good day today. He's still breathing with the oxygen. The nurse told us today that he had two episodes this morning where his oxygen saturation and heart rate dropped a bit. That felt unnerving to hear; however, the nurse wasn't worried. It happened after he got fed so she said that it's most likely some reflux. It's a normal baby response. She also was talking about how he's learning to breathe and that's going to take some time and effort. He fed well while we were there and Daddy and I both got some skin-to-skin time with him. He is less and less sedated which is fun to see. While Brad changed his diaper today he was quite awake and checking Daddy out. Other than that time, though, he spent the skin-to-skin time sleeping. Apparently newborns sleep a lot. As we left, we got to put him in one of his outfits from home.

    Personally, there was something about today that felt like we were settling in for the long haul. I want to have more to update people with. I want to have big news, good news. But breathing takes a lot of work, and he's working on it! We just don't know how long it will be. And after that it's feeding. And each day the sedation wears off more and Brad and I find ourselves analyzing his moves to try and figure out if we can tell any more of what he can do and what he can't.

 The questions about the future are completely overwhelming. I'm tired of the questions. On top of them, we are processing a lot of emotions. We are at the hospital almost every day. Being with him, and especially now, holding him is comforting for our spirits. But we are also worn out at the end of the days. And we can tell that we get worn out when the hospital is all that our days contain. We are making sure that we have "distracting" or semi-normal activities to help us mentally. And placing each day, question, and emotion before the Lord, knowing that He will give us the ticket when the time comes.

     Please pray that Brad and I can start to take a look at the future whenever God says it's time to look past a day or a week ahead. Please pray for healing and strength in Leo's body. Little guy has been through a lot in his 12 days of life. Please pray for the health of our relationship, relationships with God, and sanity.

    And, thank you from the bottom of our hearts for you support. We cannot do this alone. At all. We can see God working through you all.